How Does Reading Affect Your Relationships With Others?

As human beings we all desire connections with other people. This is a fact of life and no man is really an island.

Reading books is often times painted as one of those hobbies that are strictly for introverts. This may be partly but not all the way true.

Both introverts and extroverts read books.

Reading being an activity that is best done alone usually brings up a lot of questions with regard to relationships.

In particular the effect of reading on relationships.

This post will explore this and provide some context around relationships and reading.

With that said, How does reading affect your relationships with others?

Reading allows you to create deeper relationships and connections with people. Books improve our communication skills and empathy which are two of the most important facets in social interactions.  Therefore people that read are able to have better relations with others.

Now that we’ve discussed briefly the importance of reading in relationships let’s get deeper into the reasons why reading affects relationships positively.


Reading is one activity that allows us to relax. As a matter of fact most anger and anxiety management coaches will tell you that reading is one way to tackle heightened emotions like anxiety and anger.

This relaxation as you read more and more books becomes a part of you. You’ll become a lot more calm, patient and open to understanding.

Patience is useful in nurturing relationships because essentially all relationships are based on our ability to compromise and be patient with the people we associate with and ultimately love.


The more books you read the more information you have at your disposal.

All relationships thrive on the ability of people to effectively communicate and learn from one another.

Therefore reading has a positive effect on relationships because reading books makes you open minded.

Having an open mind is essential in any relationship because everyone is unique and what works for you may be completely new to others.

The relationship is bound to work if you’re willing to adjust to other people’s way of life as well as their perception and interpretation of the world.

This is easily done when you have the ability to keep an open mind and not be restricted to your world view.


Reading has a way of drawing on our emotions. For every book we read, we identify with either the author or the characters in the book themselves.

The more we read, the more we cultivate our ability to empathise and understand people more deeply.

In relationships, empathy and the ability to understand people beyond the surface is something that is very Important. And I don’t think any relationship survives without deep understanding and empathy from  all parties.

Therefore reading is helpful in improving the way we understand things as well as the way we empathise with others.

Communication skills

Reading is a great way to know how to communicate better with people.

The more exposure you have to written works, the more you’re able to express yourself well.

There are a ton of books out there but they all share the same thing…

They’re basically a written communication. The author does their best to talk to you and explain whatever the book is about.

When you open up a book to read, the communication begins.

Good communication skills are important in any relationships because being able to express yourself in a way that your partner or partners can understand is the only way they can understand you better.

Listening skills

This is an extension of the previous point. communication is a two way process.

it’s basically listening and speaking.

Reading is a way of receiving communication but I like to think of it as ….the author explaining things to you while you listen and process them in your mind.

Therefore reading increasing your ability to listen better before responding…

Being a good listener is an important facet in communication which is why a person that is used to taking in communication will be able to relate better and respond better to people.

Improved vocabulary

Reading also improves your vocabulary. This is a good thing because it can boost your confidence in what you say to people. Making communication even more effective.

Which is why a person that reads a lot can easily relate with other people.

The impact of reading on relationships as we can tell is obviously positive.

Being able to speak with confidence and proper articulation is what you need to sustain a relationship.

which brings me to my next point.

Polished perspective

The more you basically read, the more you possess a wealth of information from which you can draw.

People that read have a better or polished perspective on life in general.

When we read things we enter a writers mind and we allow them in ours. What happens then is a trade of information between us and them.

We receive information and allow it to alter our thinking and our lives until we make a conclusion with this new information. Which then becomes part of our perspective.

High quality information improves our perspective therefore making us better at conversation.

This polished perspective translates positively into our daily lives as well as our relationships with others.

How reading can be nurtured in relationships

If you want to strengthen your relationships by getting into reading with your partners or friends, below are some ways you can do this…

Read together

The best way to make reading a part of your relationship is figuring out a way for you to read together.

This is a great way to have a shared interest in something.

Not everyone likes to read but you can introduce it in the relationship and build on it together.

Discuss books you like

A great way to bond in a relationship is obviously discussing things you have a shared interest in.

If at all you have a book in common then discuss it together so you can understand your partner better and the key things that stick out to them in the book.

This is a great way to also share what you enjoy reading as well as point out the things that you enjoyed in the book.

You can easily discuss your understanding of a book and it may be a learning experience for the both of you.

Go on book dates

Book dates are a great way to spend time with your partner.

You can choose a place where you can both go to read.

For example, a picnic can be a great place for you and your partner to read…

Buy books for your relationship partner

A great way to introduce reading into a relationship is by gifting your partners or friends with books.

The sheer sentimental value of the gift is going to make them read the book.

Recommend books

Recommending books to one another is another great way to cultivate reading in a relationship.

Book recommendations from somebody you have a relationship with usually mean more and can make you take them seriously.

Be open to recommendations

Book recommendations are a two way streak so ensure that you’re also open to receiving recommendations and not only giving them.

Related Articles You Should Read

Are Book Worms Introverts?

Can Reading Change Your Personality?

How Does The Reading Of Fiction Enhance Our Understanding Of Human Nature?

Helpful Resources

10 Ways Reading Can Help Improve Your Relationships – Bustle

Why Reading A Book Is Good For Your Relationships – HuffPost

Science Says Reading a Book Makes You a Better Friend – Electric Literature

How My Reading Habits Affect My Relationships – The Book Wheel Blog